Use this simple process from the world of NLP.
THE META MIRROR
The Meta Mirror is a powerful mental technique to manage and make easy even what seemed to be the hardest of difficult people interactions.
The problem person or apparently difficult customer you face is actually a reflection of you. In other words this old problem is about your interpretation and perception.
Recall a difficult customer situations that you face or someone who seems to be a difficult person for you to deal with.
This mental process will help you gain powerful new insights and perspectives which can transform this relationship.
Layout the four spaces on the floor (post it notes are good)
When moving from position to position always physically shake off the thoughts and ideas of the previous position. Layout the spaces on the floor as below. Allow plenty of space to move around.
1. Now, stand at First Position, your point of view. Imagining that you are looking at the other person in second position. See what you saw, hear what you heard and feel what you feel. Ask yourself: “What am I experiencing, thinking and feeling towards this other person?”
2. Now shake that off and go and stand in second position, imagining you’re that person looking back at yourself in first position. Ask yourself: “What am I seeing and hearing, experiencing, thinking and feeling as I look at this person?”
3. Now shake that off and stand in third position. This is the independent observer looking completely impartially at both people in this relationship. “As the unattached free observer, looking at yourself in that first position, how do you respond to that ‘you’ over there?”
4. Now shake that off and stand in the further external space. The fourth position. Think about how your thoughts in the third position now, compared to your reactions in the first position. And now in your minds eye, switch them around. Move your thoughts you had in the 3rd position into the1st position and your old reactions from the 1st position into the 3rd position. What ever your reactions were, switch them around now. That’s right. Good.
5. Go back and revisit second position. Ask yourself: “How is this different now? What has changed?”
6. Finish by coming back home to first position. “Ask yourself: “how is this different now? What has changed?”
Now notice and decide how you can use this process mentally and quickly when required. You can easily use this for creating powerful relationships in the future. When you really need to, who knows, you can even put post it notes on the floor and just enjoy opening up your perceptions and notice how liberating this will be for you.